I did not think I'd make this public, but I guess it is going to be part of my mourning process. I usually check this forum every day or two to see if my professional advice can be of assistance, but tonight, I'm unable to sleep. I put my dog of 13.5 years down tonight, and I feel as if I have lost my best friend. It is still a bit surrealistic, both that he is gone and that he does not need my attention every few hours. He was paraplegic for the last 6 months, (he had a non-painful degenerative spinal condition) and I have not been away from him for more than about 4-5 hours since early October. I guess in a way that makes this harder, since we have spent so much time together in the last six months. He was my "first born" as my friend and colleague puts it, so we sort of "grew up" together, from before vet school until now. I miss him more than I could have imagined. I guess I'm being a bit indulgent in making this a thread, but he was like my child. In memory of Jack.......sorry for the drama......

Sorry for your loss. It has to be the hardest thing we have to do even though we know its the right thing. Cherish your memories and may time heal your pain.

I'm sorry for your loss of Jack too. I think everyone on this board can understand how you are feeling because most of us have been there - some many times.

Am I correct in assuming that you are a vet and you took care of this yourself? That's a different perspective than most of us have had, but I know your pain is the same and this must have been extremely difficult for you. My thoughts go out to you.

Oh, Muscat, I'm sorry. I've been there and know how you feel.

Please don't apologize for any so-called "drama," it isn't drama to share your grief with people who understand and care about your loss.

You are so helpful to us all here and I appreciate (and I believe lots of others also appreciate) your professional voice of reason and experience, it's only fair that you share your feelings with us here, too.

No one should have to bear grief alone, and it's often so hard to share our grief for our animals with a world that sees them as lesser creatures and merely possessions.

Bless you and your boy Jack, we can be grateful for the love he taught you and that he's out of his pain, at the same time we mourn your loss and the wound in your heart without him.

People always say time heals, but I don't know if that's really true. As time passes, I learn to behave as if my losses are behind me, but there are empty places in my heart that can never be filled -- and whether the missing loved one was a dog or a human doesn't seem to make a lot of difference.

I'm sorry for you and for your boy.

dear muscat, i'm so sorry for your loss. you were a "caregiver" in the true sense of the word. thinking of you and wishing you peace in your heart.

You brought tears to my eyes. I feel for you and know what you are going through. Thank goodness, time heals.

(((((HUGS)))))). I am so sorry for your loss.

I also feel your pain, and am so sorry you had to go thru this. Queenie was by my side almost constantly for over six months, and she left a large hole that will never be filled, so I do know what you're going thru. My thoughts are with you.

I am sorry for the loss of your "first born" Jack. May this help you to be a better vet as you have experienced the feelings so many of us have been through.

Thoughts and P's to you.

Also thank you for sharing your knowledge with all of us.
Judy

This message has been edited. Last edited by: southernmiss,

muscat, I am so sorry for your loss. My t & p's go out to you.
We come on this board to help each other, no need to apologize for anything. You are grieving your beloved furbaby, we all know how that feels...

I'm sorry for your loss. It is never easy.

Don't worry about drama, just let us help you cry.

Dear Muscat:
I believe those of us who love dogs will always have them in our lives (I have 3 right now). But there is that once-in-a-lifetime dog. I had mine for 10 years, and she was with me 24/7 for the last 6 of her life as she was a therapy dog and went to work with me every day. When I had to have her put down, I thought my heart would break. And, of course it did.

I tell you this because, although there is a hole in my heart that will never be filled, I can now talk about Naomi Jean without crying (that took months), and I sometimes can even laugh at the memory of her.

As I am, I hope you will be comforted by the memories of your beloved Jack, and as time passes, may you smile with pleasure as you remember your time with him.

Many blessings.

Revdani

PS Take however long you need to mourn.

Im so sorry you lost your best freind, and I truely understand your pain and how much it hurts all day and night. just know that in time, it will get a little better each day. Just remember too, he was happy to be in your life and hopefully we will be able to see them again one day.

We have all had, or will have, an animal that is EXTRA special to us. Mine was a Chi-Peke mix I had for 16 years. She was the smartest dog I ever had and was my constant companion. She even went to work with me.

When I had to have her put down, I cried for months. That has been over 16 years ago and I still miss her to this day.

Never apologize for loving and mourning one of God's precious creatures. Sometimes they are our very best friends.

I'm so sorry - wish I could hug you in person.

Sis

I'm right there with you. My husband and I just returned from having our 10 yr old German Shepherd put down. I've never been through this and I can say it's way up there on the pain list. My husband was "her's" and he's been sobbing for hours. We were with her when they put her down. She suddenly developed a bacterial infection in her heart that spread throughout her body and lungs. Please accept a hug from me.

Sorry for your loss. 'They' say time heals all wounds. But, it seems, the loss of a pet and friend is always felt.

oh muscat...I am so very sorry for your loss. I know how much it hurts, and the loss is so deep. You have been there for so many of us when we needed you. We are there for you now.

Muscat...your post brought tears to my eyes as well.
To many people they are just "pets", but to many of us they are beloved family members. I lost my dear Delilah in Jan 07 after 16 wonderful years together. She was the only thing constant in my life through a marraige, divorce, new marraige, new house, new job, etc. No one will ever replace her.
My Ts, Ps and tears are with you.

Thank you all very much- you are so kind. The house feels so oddly quiet, it is killing me. I've been through this before, with family pets, but I also believe in that "once in a lifetime" dog or cat (or bird/horse....etc) idea, and that was my Jack, so it has never been this hard before. I'm trying to embrace and cherish how hard it is as just another facet of how much he meant to me.......but darn it, I just want him back!

I have a very supportive partner, a wonderful family and a clinic with a big percentage of the staff, about 50 people, who got to know him in the last 6 months, and they have really tried to make this easier. We cried together- he just made everybody fall in love with him.

Thank you all so much. This was him back in the backpacking days, and Christmas 2 years ago:

http://i68.photobucket.com/albums/i20/aegdvm/scan.jpg

http://i68.photobucket.com/albums/i20/aegdvm/P1000544.jpg

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Oh, how I hate these threads! Because I know when I see one that someone is hurting very badly & has lost a much loved family member. Muscat, I'm so very, very sorry about your Jack. What a sweetheart he was, I could tell by his pics! What a cutie! I know the pain you're feeling & am so very sorry you're going through this. My t's & p's will definitely be with you. G*od bless.....

I started crying the second I looked at his pics. *hugs* to you.....I also know this kind of pain & to me, it's one of the very worst & most heartbreaking.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: GypsyDancer,