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At the root of every gray hair, there is a dead brain cell.

Someone had to remind me,
So I'm reminding you, too.
Don't laugh.... It is all true!
Perks of reaching 50
Or being over 60
And heading towards 70 or beyond!

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run -- anywhere.

4. People call at 9 PM (or 9 AM) and ask, 'Did I wake you?'

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now will never wear out.

8. You can eat supper at 4 PM.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list.

And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience.

Forward this to everyone you can remember right now!

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING:

Never, NEVER, NEVER, under any circumstances,
Take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night!

A good one !!

Sigh - I resemble these too.

On a serious note--the older I got, the safer I felt as a food stamp worker going into bad neighborhoods.

On a light-hearted note--we have arrived at the age where we are invisible to men, so we can wear bathing suits again!!!!!

My dress shoes have all changed from spike heels to sensible square kitten heels. Ahhhhh!

And gone are the days of getting hit on by older men, esp. in elevators. The older ones now are only interested in remembering the right floor number...

This just gave me my laugh of the day. Thanks for sharing. Sue

The cute new YOUNG pastor asks if you need help down the stairs.

The Young Boxboys at the grocery store are younger than your car and don't recognize a Taurus.

Everyone calls you honey.

You use the wrong product for the right place...

soooo funny and right on.

I had hand surgery years & years ago, and I s-w-e-a-r that the anesthesiologist was 20-something. I told him I had pantyhose older than he was! (I could tell that the doctors & nurses cracked up even tho they were wearing masks... ) But really...it's getting to the point where I'm older than my doctors.

The clerk @ the grocery store last week looked at me & said, "Do you qualify for the senior discount? No, I guess you don't." Well thanks for adding that last part, honey!!

Love this!!!!

I was talking with DS#1 this weekend, he just turned 50, and we were discussing his brother who will be turning 50 next year. Gawd, how did they get older than me????

DS#2 has been diagnosed with MS and finds doing things harder, runs out of energy sooner, can't concentrate, etc. He is in the early stages and is doing well. When I spoke with him, I told him not to be blaming the MS for his problems, those things do come with age.

DS#1 spoke up letting me know that he is already experiencing those things, and he just turned 50. lollllll

I should send both of them this list.

Pause so sorry to here about DS being diagnosed with MS I was diagnosed in 2004 and now being 50+ sometimes it is difficult to tell what is causing problems

I sent the list to a dear friend

Thanks for sharing.

Sounds just like me!

On one of the surgeries I had in the last 10 years, everybody in the room had on blue gowns and masks. I had heard that when you are going under, they ask you questions. So when the guy with the blue eyes leaned over me and said,"Talk to me," I was confused, not really knowing then what that expression meant. So I frowned, thinking, and said loudly,"I hate math!" then, "Your blue eyes match your gown,". He meant how was I doing. Sheeesh...ask that instead, I'm older.

quote:

Originally posted by nancyc20:
"I hate math!"

Then it's a good thing he didn't ask you to count backwards from 100 by sevens! The doctor did that to one of my parents when screening for Alzheimer's. I was always good at math but I'm not sure I could get much past 93 even on a good day!

Y'all are spreading a chuckle for sure!! And I resemble a lot of those remarks, too.

I've never been good at math, so they better never ask me to count backwards by sevens. I've had several surgeries, and have been asked to count backwards from 10 or 100. I'm older now and retired, I don't do math any more that doesn't involve a calculator.

Ljptexas, I love this, there is a lot of truth there!

Very funny and so true! Thanks for sharing this with us!!

Pam