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I know some of you have blogs, some are decorators, many are like me just trying to do the best we can with our budgets and the kind of homes we have(ordinary, with inherant problems), we are all different ages, backgrounds, talents, lifestyles, etc. BUT we all have a common interest and that is our homes!!!! There always will be photos of styles and things that just aren't you. So its OK to just keepa you mouth shut!

I will be perfectly OK with no comments here, and no answers to qestions, this is just for thought.

Since there are lots of photos from blogs, HOUZZ, etc. do you not post photos of your homes because your photography skills are not good enough? Feel your decor doesn't measure up?
Do you not comment because you don't like something? Or have no answers? No interest in that particular subject?
Have you ever been offedned by a response to a post?

I know many are like me-just don't have time to respond to everything..Like many times I don't respond to Monday Morning finds, although i love seeing them and many I just want to say-I would love to have that..

MY comments-I seldom look at blogs, but regularly do HOUZZ, BHG, frequent Pinterest, and ocasionally others.. Not a blogs fan as I get tired of scrolling thru 10 photos of a table setting, or such.

A few months ago I tried to start a once a month share photo thread. Got lots of responses to the first two or three and then NADA. I was ok with that, though disappointed. But for those of you who rememeber and did post, thank you!

Last question-do you like posts of our own homes? These are my favorite kind, and since I seldom have answers, or at least good enough answers, to the ones with decorating questions, I will refrain from commenting.

I am a visual person so reading long descriptions of spaces lose me these days. My brain must be too full lately. I like seeing everyone's pictures and tho i don't comment i do "like" all your efforts.

I have not been feeling very helpful in the decor world these days. And color is not my forte since i don't seem to see the same colors that other see.


I haven't posted pics of my house lately because i've not made any changes in the decor, I have two people living in my living room now and a third in my daughter's room so we have a house full. I do share home life pics on instagram.com/wendykingsmith and Facebook.

I'm Sorry to have missed so many fun threads myself with all that is going on, i try to lurk. and i'll lurk more when i can get my house back

I don't read many blogs, but do frequent Facebook and Instagram. I love Houzz on my iPad for the pictures, of course.


Someone mentioned in some other thread about sharing on Facebook. I don't mean to take away from this bbs, but perhaps that would be a fun idea for those who would want to join a Facebook group to share home photos. just a thought because I DO Like to see photos of other's homes.

I'm also a fan of other's dishware. I love to see your dishes. Even cocok's after Thanksgiving dinner dishes

These days seems like I must post in a hurry! I'm so busy- like now, I am eating lunch then its back to work for me!

I didn't come here for awhile- cliquish, busy, not decorating. But I have noticed since I've been back, the cliquishness is gone. Although I really miss all the activity and larger membership of the old days, I don't miss that!

I haven't posted pics because I haven't been decorating.(Did I post my kitchen redo last summer? I think I did...) I hope for that to change in 2013 though. DH and I are working on some planning upcoming projects. Lots of before and after pics if it all pans out!

I prefer to see pics of members homes and projects, not a fan of lots of professional pics and links being posted, but sometimes is okay.

I read a lot but don't reply to everything. Am trying to do better.

For me, the thing about facebook is that what I want to ask about here or share her, I don't want to share or ask with my Facebook friends.

What I like about here is that it is real people homes and pictures. I like inspiration pictures and websites, but sometimes they are too "model/picture perfect"...

My favorite posts here are the ones where sincere homeowners are seeking help or advice about a decorating dilemma. Some I don't answer because I either don't have a good answer or because someone else has posted the same idea or advice. And, I like reading about creative problem-solving.

I also like discussions about the greater world of design and decor outside of our individual homes, for ex. design trends, design history, celebrity homes, professional designers and the like.

As for my home, I post very little because I am not comfortable with decorating by committee. Also, I am not interested in attagirls or affirmations.

Recently, a professional photographer came to my home to shoot interiors because a realtor wanted them to appear in a commercial and print ads. That was fun and I got my 15 minutes of fame. That was enough for me.

I am with you about most amateur design blogs: 25 close-ups of a tablescape or the same vignette over and over again and lots of blah-blah is not my idea of fun. Which is why I enjoy Houzz, Interior Design, and professional design websites.

quote:

Since there are lots of photos from blogs, HOUZZ, etc. do you not post photos of your homes because your photography skills are not good enough? Feel your decor doesn't measure up?
Do you not comment because you don't like something? Or have no answers? No interest in that particular subject?
Have you ever been offedned by a response to a post?

Yes to all of the above. I have posted pictures of my home in the past and I am grateful for the responses I did get. I will assume that the people who did not respond, just didn't like what they saw. I came to this board three years ago to ask for advice and was pleasantly surprised to see that there was, in fact, "real" and by that I mean "professional" designers, but I don't ever recall getting a response from any of them. Oh well, whatever. I still enjoy coming here.

I do love looking at other people's homes, but sometimes I just don't have any ideas/talent/creativity to answer their questions

Right after I made my response we got a verbal approval of our home improvement loan...it's all over but the paperwork and then let the fun begin! Y'all are gonna be sick of my questions and pics before it's all over!

I love this board! I don't love when the conflicts arise, though. Over the years, my participation has ebbed and flowed with life changes, but I try to check in to see what's new as often as possible.

I much prefer seeing pics of member's homes, but I can appreciate some of the links, too. Do not get into blogs or Houzz or pintrest unless by link referrals. Not enough time.

When I have something to say, I usually do...I really like the idea of helping someone solve a problem. If I don't have anything helpful to add to a conversation, I usually scroll on by.

This board has served a purpose in my life...an escape from everyday c r a p...a place to share, laugh and even cry. So, when the "stuff" starts to fly around here, I take offense, I take a few potshots or I take off. Great place.

I love seeing photos of board member's homes. Those are my favorite. Just love seeing everyone's different styles and seeing how us "real people" live in our homes. Sites like Houzz are great for awe inspiring inspiration but I personally get bored with looking at perfection.
I do not respond to posts as often as I would like because there are always much more articulate responses than I can come up with. I usually have an opinion but the posts above me already said it much better! I think someone said we need a "like" button like on Facebook and I couldn't agree more!

quote:

Originally posted by Becky56:
Y'all are gonna be sick of my questions and pics before it's all over!

Congrats. And, bring it on! Can't wait to see your posts and pix.

A couple of my answers for what they're worth.
Pics, my camera always seems to take pics of my condo that are too high resolution for what this board can handle, and I'm not technically proficient enough to reformat the pics.

Comments,this is tough to say but sometimes the pics are so opposed to every design priciple I've been taught or learned, it's better to keep my mouth shut.(entire rooms of matching brown leather-there I've said it!)

Being offended,not offended but sometimes taken aback when I offer tried and true, solid,globally accepted design priciples only to be contradicted by a personal opinion that has no basis in fact. But as they say "ya'throws the dice, and takes yer' chances".No real harm done, just some head scratching on my part.

quote:

Comments,this is tough to say but sometimes the pics are so opposed to every design priciple I've been taught or learned, it's better to keep my mouth shut.(entire rooms of matching brown leather-there I've said it!)

hahaha remind me not to show pics of my family room with my matching brown leather sofas I could use your help on adding color in there though, Charles. If I get brave enough, I post a pic.....

First of all, I read regularly and post occasionally. If someone asks our opinion, they need to remember that all opinions and suggestions may not be to their liking, as we are real people with diverse backgrounds. Also unless something moves me strongly, if a poster has received many comments I'm less than likely to respond.
I personally like seeing our own homes as they represent what we have and every home has unique challenges that we try to fix/solve. If I post I will not be put off by lack of responses for reasons already stated.
Lastly, I DO NOT want to participate thru Facebook. That's a separate function and would not necessarily want to share with all of Facebook friends.

quote:

Originally posted by Charles D:

Comments,this is tough to say but sometimes the pics are so opposed to every design principle I've been taught or learned, it's better to keep my mouth shut.

Being offended,not offended but sometimes taken aback when I offer tried and true, solid,globally accepted design principles only to be contradicted by a personal opinion that has no basis in fact.

I often stop myself from answering questions because certain posters really get their hackles up when a designer offers input. There is nothing wrong with anyone on this board speaking their mind but don't get uptight when someone with professional training disagrees with you. And to respond to another comment on a different thread, there is nothing snobbish about sharing information that is, to quote Charles, 'true, solid globally accepted design principles.' When I joined this board, it was with the goal of sharing information, resources and knowledge that has taken years to accumulate. If my opinion has no value to you, feel free to ignore it.

quote:

Originally posted by Cavin:

quote:

Originally posted by Charles D:

Comments,this is tough to say but sometimes the pics are so opposed to every design principle I've been taught or learned, it's better to keep my mouth shut.

Being offended,not offended but sometimes taken aback when I offer tried and true, solid,globally accepted design principles only to be contradicted by a personal opinion that has no basis in fact.

I often stop myself from answering questions because certain posters really get their hackles up when a designer offers input. There is nothing wrong with anyone on this board speaking their mind but don't get uptight when someone with professional training disagrees with you. And to respond to another comment on a different thread, there is nothing snobbish about sharing information that is, to quote Charles, 'true, solid globally accepted design principles.' When I joined this board, it was with the goal of sharing information, resources and knowledge that has taken years to accumulate. If my opinion has no value to you, feel free to ignore it.

Hear, Hear. I am not a professional designer, and I love hearing from the professionals on this board. Actually, I like hearing from anyone -- pro or talented amateur -- who has something inspiring, creative, and knowledgeable to say about design and decor and who likes to share resources and information.

quote:

Originally posted by WWanda:

quote:

Comments,this is tough to say but sometimes the pics are so opposed to every design priciple I've been taught or learned, it's better to keep my mouth shut.(entire rooms of matching brown leather-there I've said it!)

hahaha remind me not to show pics of my family room with my matching brown leather sofas I could use your help on adding color in there though, Charles. If I get brave enough, I post a pic.....

Wanda, I'm cracking up, thanks! great story:we 're an ID firm but we do have a showroom where we sell our stuff off the floor. A long time client brings her husband in for the first time. He goes into the room I decorated as "the man cave" and says "I really like this room, can we just do this at our place." "Sure , I can do a room like this." " No, I mean can I just buy this room, artwork and everything." "Ahhh, sure, do you want it for Christmas?"Moral: sometimes you just got to "buy the room", even if you're working with a designer.

I enjoy reading the threads here, but I don't often comment, usually because I don't have anything to offer or because someone else has already said what I would have said. I enjoy participating in the MMF thread because it is about sharing enjoyment of relatively small finds, not so much about larger projects. I think affirming that enjoyment in a response is part of the pleasure.

I don't read blogs regularly, search Houzz, or participate on FB, so I appreciate it when a poster shares inspirational links that they've discovered. I try to remember to say thank you on those threads, but I don't always manage it.

Certainly, I have felt discomfited by some responses to threads or by the lack of response to a thread, but I try to let those feelings go and not dwell on them. I don't play favorites. If I haven't responded to one of your threads, it's because I don't have anything helpful to add to the discussion...no hidden agenda.

I haven't been here nearly as long as many of you, but I do wish there was more traffic. I imagine the general economic malaise, the advent of Facebook and the directional change of HGTV programming have a lot to do with the diminishing participation.

http://boards.hgtv.com/eve/for...013936667#7013936667

My thread with a REAL project in progress, over 200 views and 14 responses (only a few people).

The truth is everyone wants a SOLUTION or FINAL photo in the thread and ** spent on high end features. So, what do you do when you do not do this? LOTS of views and very few responses...

So that is why I won't share my projects here any longer, because it just is not worth the effort.

NO ONE wants to see a project in progress, not at the speed my budget makes me move in!

Good luck with your board experiences... they are NOT positive for everyone, ESPECIALLY those who actually POST projects!

Thanks to those who have given me the courtesy of responding on that thread! I will go ahead with my project and finish my home no matter WHAT HAPPENS on any board with my posts!


Stick with Pinterest and those areas where you get 'instant gratification' if you like FAST results!

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mary Ruth,

Homebody, I feel that the big question behind all of your questions is why do some posts get lots of responses and some none. Also maybe you are asking in general why we post the way we do.

I am sure that there could be as many different answers to that as there are members on this board.

My answer is that originally I came to this board during a hard time in my life. My mother was slowly dy.ing of brain cancer. It was practically unbearable to me to watch the process. During those dark quiet hours I found this website and discovered that "giving" to this site made me feel better. I am a designer, and so I kind of felt that when I gave advice that I would normally charge a fee for, I was kind of giving a gift to someone. Even if they didn't take my advice, or like my posts, it still gave me a chance to give of myself. So posting for me in the beginning was very healing, if that makes sense, and it was about giving or contributing.

I still come back because I am interested in the people here, and feel kind of like I know many of you. I also like to write, and I find it fun to compose a quick response. I feel grateful to the board for giving me an outlet when I was going through something hard. Of course I am also passionate about design. But I am one of those people who rarely asks for advice, and I usually am not a thread starter. (Although I did start that thread about the Halloween makeover challenge) My time is very limited now, and so I pop in and choose a topic and make a comment and then I am gone. If someone has already said what I would have said in a thread I scroll on and pick something else to comment on.

I only post pictures of my home when I am sharing an idea, or if it can answer someone's question.

I don't get offended by posts, but I can be relentless about certain topics, like the importance of design education. I actually enjoy a brisk debate, and I don't see them as bad at all.

As to why some threads get more comments than others, it is a mystery to me. Maybe some topics just connect with a wider audience, or more people have experienced that challenge and have something to share. I don't know.

I will say that a person who comes here to give or share freely will probably be less frustrated than someone who comes with the expectation of getting something specific. In my opinion, those who post with the expectation of getting a certain number of responses, or are offended if they don't get certain responses, or compare the responses they get with the responses other people get, are setting themselves up for disappointment.

So that is my take on this topic.

And P.S. I really liked your once a month photo share, homebody. I can't remember if I posted on it, but I thought it was fun.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: cocok,

quote:

In my opinion, those who post with the expectation of getting a certain number of responses, or are offended if they don't get certain responses, or compare the responses they get with the responses other people get, are setting themselves up for disappointment.

Well said, cocok.

I don't want anyone to leave. Please don't go. I love seeing everyones projects and homes. Even though I don't post all the time. If my computer was working properly I would be posting pics. I'm trying to get it solved.
I love when I have or anyone else has a project going. And we can all watch the process.

Please stay people. MaryRuth don't go. Love seeing your home and your projects.

Mary Ruth, I for one love to see works in progress, especially yours. Not to mention your mock-ups and elevations. It makes things so much easier to understand, at least for this visual learner.

Here's my part - I have been coming here for over 15 years, though there was a big gap where I just had to get a new handle (thus giving away my southern roots, using trucking radio slang for a name). I get busy and miss it for a long time, and then come back when I'm laid up or on vacation.

When I had lots of time, you would see me participating in a lot of the more social elements - monday am finds, birthdays, etc.

I think overall the board is remarkably kind and always imagine that when something comes off as snarky that the person in real-life is warm and funny and we can't see how the words were really intended without that context.

I appreciate you all - comments, questions, posters, professionals, and have learned almost as much from writing / working to write clearly about visual elements, because I remember what I know, as I have from hearing from all of you.

I love your drawing up what you want to do and posting, Mary Ruth. Until lately it was a laborious process for me to take a photo, size it, and upload it, so I don't post photos a lot. I also have few skills in that area, so my photos lack a lot! Love other photos, and floor plans and concepts.

Mary Ruth, I think you're being a teensy bit sensitive. Your title read very much like a call out to one poster, and then the entire thread somewhat like a PM. I'm guessing that wasn't your intention but that's how it came off to me. Good luck with your very ambitious project...I've no doubt that with your design talent and your DH's building expertise it will be beautiful.

...and another thing, I'm not a chatterbox. As a matter of fact, DH complains constantly that I don't talk to him enough, so my posts are usually short and to the point, and few and far between. Some folks share freely and others are more reticent. I'm a Yankee, after all...

Mary Ruth , I didn't respond to your post because I thought you and zone9lady were discussing your recent kitchen experiences. My eye really went to the settee- it's gorgeous. What style/period would you call it -Federal perhaps??

wendek - I love dishes too!
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do you not post photos of your homes because your photography skills are not good enough?

For me, that has nothing to do with it. I know that my decorating style (quilts, dishes, Americana) holds little interest for most people on the board. Also, if it is interesting, I've probably already shown it. I'm in my "forever" house, and I'm done making most of the changes. Now it's just a new piece here and there. I will be changing one of my bedrooms from babyish to "children" this year. I have bunkbeds stored that look like a train, so I might ask for some help!

Do you not comment because you don't like something? Or have no answers? No interest in that particular subject?

Yes to all three questions. With all the good advice from the many decorator's and designers on the board (and I thank you!), my homemaker input would not add anything. What the designers, etc do need to understand, not everyone can afford to make the suggested changes, and I believe sometimes all that is wanted is confirmation that others like it, or it's appealing as is. I do like to see what everyone's done.

Last, I don't come to the board everyday, so I miss some things. Every year my New Year's resolution is to spend less time on the computer, and be more productive with my time. right now I have two baby quilt gifts to make, and two Quilts of Valor. The computer really cuts into my spare time. I often read the board from my Kindle, and posting from the Kindle is not nearly as easy as from the computer, so I usually just read. I'm sure there are many people that just browse the boards without joining, so that could account for a large number of views but few responses.
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Have you ever been offedned by a response to a post?

Never to one of MY posts (I don't start many topics), but I've been taken aback a few times to responses to others' posts. Generally, I think it's a nice board, and when there are abrasive responses it's been few and far between.

My favorite posts are before and after photos of a project! I also like seeing what people are working on and their progress photos.

Common interest is definitely decorating our homes.

Not everyone's style is the same but it is still fun to look. Even if I'm not going to do that in my home, I may get ideas for room arrangement, how to combine patterns, how to pull it all together, etc.

I love, love, love to see pics showing how everyone else decorates. It took me awhile to realize that professional pics are staged. I would wonder, how can people be so clean, have a perfect looking house, and actually "live" in it? For us it's just not feasible. An example is this pic I saved because I think the room is so pretty. I asked my hubby one night if he would be able to live in a room like that because it seems "girly" to me. He said "do you know what I see, I see clutter everywhere, and things waiting to get broke". Not that it was too "girly". I have alot of issues myself decorating and I don't think I'm qualified to give advise so often I don't respond in fear of sounding "stupid".

Belstone,
Thanks for pointing that out, I DID NOT mean to sound that way! LOTS going on here at home I am dealing with, but...

The only thing I was not liking is that THIS THREAD was even started! Why is it that someone (I am noticing the same people mostly) starts a thread to complain when the board is slow! We just finished posting about Christmas and New Year's. Already in 2013 there is a post about negativity.

So, I gave my 'complaining side' a bit of exercise! LOL nothing more...

I am not mad nor irritated even... said my peace... and realize that:
times change
people change
circumstances for Real Life are there for everyone
this is NOT a girl's club
this is NOT a one-clique show (said in humor and tolerance intended manner)

And YES I did intend for Paint91Lady to see that post first! I wanted to make sure she found it OK, then changed the title after she responded. I felt it was my way to get her to feel honored she had been an inspiration! It was a NEW way of posting for me I thought would be effective. I only commented on here as an example of many views and not many responses using my OWN post as an example instead of mentioning anyone else. That is all, I do NOT want to mention names or start anything...

This board has its own personality, and it is created by its users, I understand that and am willing to post here as long as I enjoy it, when I don't, I won't SAME as anyone else would.

I choose to live in the PRESENT, not a resolution but an affirmation for 2013.


WISHING PEACE for everyone in 2013!

*

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Mary Ruth,

Belstone, my DH would love you. He thinks I talk way too much

quote:

Originally posted by cocok:
I will say that a person who comes here to give or share freely will probably be less frustrated than someone who comes with the expectation of getting something specific. In my opinion, those who post with the expectation of getting a certain number of responses, or are offended if they don't get certain responses, or compare the responses they get with the responses other people get, are setting themselves up for disappointment.

Well said.

My photography skills are not the greatest altho that has never stopping me from posting pics. When my decor no longer measures up for me that is when I will make changes. Many times with threads I get the impression people are looking for affirmations not ideas. There are many time other's responses leave me almost speechless but I avoid being offended by not posting my own stuff. I don't need that useless kind of controversy in my life. I just want a nice low-drama lifestyle altho some people seem to crave drama in their lives.

The name of the game for me in life and in decorating is knowledge and I learn more from professionals than I do from non-experts. Why would a professional decorator's opinion not be worth more than someone who only likes to play at something? I do often read people's decoration questions and especially enjoy reading answers from cocok and the other professionals - an expert opinion is always of more value to me. When I have health, legal, plumbing, or electrical problems I go to professionals. So I am unlikely to post a question on the forum for that reason as well as:
1. I have strong personal opinions, have as an amateur studied ID for decades, and prefer my own unique style which I don't expect anyone else to understand.
2. Tending a thread gets to be tiresome
3. I'm a very private person and don't want pics of my house all over the net

I don't mind giving my 2 cents to others' questions but often feel there is so much more involved in making some of these rooms right that it's almost a lost cause. Where does one begin when the person asks what color to paint and it won't be enough to fix it? I have little curiosity about what the homes of other members look like as used to be in real estate and saw how a lot of “real people” live. Add my dislike of a lot of bad modern architecture and a coat of paint will not do it. It just makes me sad because these people have spent so much on their homes and value has not been received. However, I may be the only one who thinks this way because there are always so many nice comments about what a lovely home, etc. I think there are many who have grown up with these “non-style” styles and see them as something good, when in fact they are just bad architecture that decorating really cannot cure.

I thought your once-a-month photo-share thread was a great idea altho was very busy last summer so I don't think I posted to it.

I know I feel differently from others in that I prefer looking at professionally decorated homes as feel I can learn more from them. So I spend more time on those sites than here. I don't mind trying to help others tho as I usually have an opinion on almost everything. It would be nice if we could have some discussion threads on home decor topics as a learning tool but most of my threads don't get very many responses so perhaps I'll leave that for someone else to start.

I wish people would not take offense to lack of comments on threads. It's really not a popularity contest. The board is so slow right now and I often don't even open a thread if the title doesn't interest me. So Mary Ruth when you put zone9lady's name in the title I didn't even look. It seemed to be a discussion between the 2 of you.

quote:

Originally posted by joyluck:

I know I feel differently from others in that I prefer looking at professionally decorated homes as feel I can learn more from them. So I spend more time on those sites than here. I don't mind trying to help others tho as I usually have an opinion on almost everything.

You are not alone. My sentiments exactly.