Most of the people I have to buy for at Christmas time ALL have much more than they need. No small children. It is almost impossible to think of something to give them.
My niece knows that I don't NEED or want anything but for some reason is always able to think of something to absolutely delight me.
HOW does one shop for people who have EVERYTHING???
I have a similar dilemma. For the past two years we've been invited (same state, but miles away) to BIL's house. They have absolutely EVERYTHING and then some. I recall my SIL stating that she'd love Christmas mugs so I found a set of 8 at William Sonoma (and will give a gift receipt just in case). The worst situation is not only to shop for people of wealth, but not being able to see them but once or twice a year makes matters worse since you don't know what they could use. I say put thought vs. extravagence into the gift and include a gift receipt. Then...you've experienced the joy of the season with little worries that your gift won't be trashed. After all...it's the thought that counts. BTW, in the past, I've done some floral pieces because SIL always appreciates them. So...giving of your time, a gift card, a donation to their fav charity in their name or even a talent via a handmade gift, baked goods, etc. that you're sure fits their taste, are other alternatives.
I try to find something that they will enjoy and might not buy for themselves. If that item is consumable, it's even better. Some ideas I've used in the past are pure Kona or Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee, homemade cookies or jams, pretty padded or wooden clothes hangers, a special bottle of wine or liquor that I know they love, or a battery-operated, auto-grind pepper mill for the ones who like to cook.This message has been edited. Last edited by: Graciepj,
I absolutely agree with giving something consumable. Most people have enough items in their home without feeling obligated to display something you have given them, or worse yet, store it and bring it out when you visit. We like to give gift cards to a favorite restaurant or garden center, or a gift basket with a favorite recipe, the ingredients to make it and the perfect bottle of wine to serve.
Ditto with the consumables.
Oh this is hard but easy too.I really should be a professional shopper.I love to read people and pay close attention to their character and details in their lives.I give touching and sentimental gifts to loved ones.But I am hard to buy for,not really if they just pay attention,I drop hints all year long,LOL.
One thing to think about, and I say this with some trepidation, is to quit giving certain/most people gifts. In my family we concentrate more on the children. My sisters and I no longer give gifts to each other, but we get together on Christmas and have fun together. I don't give gifts to my husband's siblings either, but we have a holiday gathering that is fun. My nieces and nephews are getting grown up, so no gifts exchanged there. That leaves me free to give gifts to my children and grandchildren, and my husband of course. Even there, we have limited the gifts to one or two nice things. Less gift giving is a relief to me, and I really love to concentrate on other things at Christmas.
I'd really like to be released from giving gifts to my mother-in-law and husband. They want for nothing and, when pressed for gift ideas, can't come up with anything. I so wish they'd tell me to forget about gift giving; it would be such a relief.
Oh I would LOVE to stop giving presents like Cocok.
The last couple of years, I have been including money in a card. The children are simply impossible to buy for. At my age, I am so far removed from what kids like these days and its complicated by the fact that their parents buy them EVERYTHING.
I have to chuckle at the thought of what my dear mother told me about walking across the parking lot of a shopping center muttering every filthy word she had ever heard or could conjure up - all because of having to shop for presents. And the males are the absolute worst At least for females, one can always buy clothing.
my husband just announced a couple of hours ago that we were going to Florida to spend Christmas with his mother so I guess I can start putting the Christmas stuff away that I had dragged out.
Don't you have a vote?
I agree with Cocok.DH family only gets under the age of 18.We only get our 2-DD,their hubbys,3 grandkids,2 neices on DH side and our parents.But for the last couple of months I've been telling my parents we are only buying for the 6,5 & 2 yr.old grans & 2 neices.My DM doesnt understand this idea.But she has so many grankids and great grands,that she only buys us 4 daughters gifts.NO one else.I think it's wrong,it's about the little ones opening gifts and seeing ther cute faces.
Anyway...I say just having a get together and having snacks,laughing is perfectlly fine and makes beautiful memories.
My Grandchildren are now 20 and 17. My DD is absolutely no help in suggesting gifts for any of them. Also DSIL b.d. is Christmas Eve. He is a birder so we got him an expensive bird feeder, which sounds like a stupid gift but we think he will like it.
Like what the others of you say, they can (and do) buy much more than we can afford. They are also creative so scratch baking them or making them anything. I am doing a sort of photo thing that I will share with this forum when I get it done.
For us we buy while together. Today we got me a ring and I must have looked at every one in the store! BTW this store and the one we had been in previously both remembered us from years ago, it was kind of nice to be so warmly greeted.
Not that I would know what to buy but I refuse to get DGS one of those video things.
Jackie I think your Mom is right. YOU are her children. The little ones will get enough
The best Christmas gift for me would be to have DD be ready for Christmas (food purchased, presents wrapped, tree trimmed etc etc) so that after we get there we would just have the meals to get and enjoy ourselves.
Our family has grown too large to buy presents for everyone. All the children under 18 get a gift from each aunt and uncle which adds up to quite a few things. The adults draw names and the last few years we agreed they had to be hand made. I am fortunate to have very creative relatives and these hand crafted gifts have become the highlight of Christmas. In fact our 18 year old niece is excited to finally be a part of the name drawing this year.
Years ago, my cousin invited me over for dinner (hadn't been to her house in years). When I asked what I could bring, she told me nothing, that they had too much stuff in her house, she didn't need anything, and there wasn't anything she could possibly use. Just come. Not wanting to arrive empty handed, I brought a large package of toilet paper! It's been a standing joke in the family for years and I've yet to find a family member to admit they have no use for it!
Came back to say that for those of you who would like to reduce the numbers of gifts...just bring up the conversation with the people involved.
My sisters and I quit the gift giving when one sister was having a hard time financially, and she got us together and wanted to talk about it. Of course we were all willing to end the gift exchanging. It helped her, and it relieved all the rest of us too. Same with my in laws. Someone brought it up and we all voted YES!
JayMom,I just might start your Christmas custom for us as gifts.Never can have enough,right?
I know people play Dirty Santa.We never have but heard it's fun.
Love the idea of handmade.
LoS,last Christmas we had a small gathering at DM & DF,they only wanted the daughters & hubbys on Christmas Eve and the grands and Ggrands came on Christmas day.We was snacking in the livingroom,DM said Jackie here is your gift.She removed her second wedding set of rings and handed them to me.I could not contain my crying.Then she called my sisters names and gave them certain rings.I really hope she doesnt do this again this year,I might not can handle it.She has never gave any of her jewerly before.It really shocked us all.DF was mad but got over it.
We went to see "Lincoln" the other night and movies/treats aren't inexpensive anymore. I think a gift certificate to a movie plus treats would be a great gift.
An elderly family member who doesn't like going to movie theaters any more mentioned wanting to see a specific movies so I bought it and am going to put together a movie/popcorn basket.
Being interested in decorating everyone cringes at the thought of buying me anything for my place which is fine with me. I prefer anything related to my "coffee habit" and that is what I receive. I'm sure the same would work for tea lovers.
A little gift that is really fun is the amaryllis they sell at this time of the year.
They are really fun to watch grow and beautiful.
If this person is computer literate a subscription to netflix is a good gift too.
We have cut back hugely; I promised hubby I would. I have several grown grands, with kids of their own, who have rarely thanked me for a gift, so this year it will be a card only and to a couple of them just a text greeting...may sound like I'm mean, but you would understand if you knew all the circumstances.
It hurts my heart, but I became tired of feeling taken advantage of for the last almost 30 years and I'm doing something about it.
I am going to go ahead and give my nephew his card with cash in it again this year. It is a fairly substantial amount of cash I give him but this year I'm writing on the card that it is the LAST until I get a Thank You. He is almost 51 years old!!!!
To Jackie::::No I don't get a vote. My husband announced that he is spending Christmas with his mother if he has to crawl. He is having hip replacement surgery next week. His mother is 97. She is the only parent that either of us have left. He thought she was going to be alone but there is a possibility that his brother is going to still be there. My husband would NOT enjoy being around his brother. I will not enjoy being around his mother after the stunts she has pulled the last 5 years. Sounds mean but the woman is in better shape than I am.
I was enjoying the idea of having Christmas dinner at my new table which will accommodate all 12 of us for the first time since my mother stopped having the big dinners in her dining room. BUT I will enjoy the TRIP to Florida as well as the TRIP back. My husband is fun to travel with and our vehicle makes even going to Wal-Mart an adventure. My son doesn't seem to mind us being gone at Christmas. That and my fear that my niece would be terribly upset were the things that were unsettling me the most.
I keep thinking this may be my mother in law's last Christmas but with another childhood friend dying yesterday, who knows? It may be MY last Christmas ::::::::smiling:::::::::
Love,Lu,I completely understand about spending time with our parents and sick family members.My parents are close by and hubbys family near coast of NC.We have been staying home during the holidays.Then the day after we go to his family for a week.They do understand and I am grateful for it.
Set your table for a Christmas dinner anyway.So when you get home you & your DH can sit down and have a nice holiday dinner alone.That would be wonderful and not that much to pack away.
I could really use you this time of year!
Yes.....how about something for a husband who immediately buys anything he wants:::::::laughing::::::
I have a niece that did not send one thank you note for her wedding gifts. Nor does she ever host any kind of dinner for her family or even welcome them into her home, nor of course, send a Xmas card. But I get cards from very few of my nieces and nephews. Although I greet her lovingly on the rare times I see her I would not extend myself at all for anything for her.
Jackie, it is hard to get a "read" on people you don't see often. My 17 year old grandson is particularly hard for me to buy for, but someone told me about Ebay's daily deals and I have gotten many gifts there including two for him. One is a pen that has a video camera. It was under $12. I also got him a blue tooth thing for $30. I also got him a wonderful sports jacket at Goodwill for $5 (I mean a dressy type jacket) His family loves to shop at Goodwill and Salvation army even though they don't need to!
For the children who I only see once a year and never hear from at any other time, I make cookies and package them in gift boxes with a ribbon. That gives them something to open, it's a gift within my budget, and I don't have to know their sizes or interests.This message has been edited. Last edited by: Graciepj,
IMO a nice gift for anyone who has everything is a donation to a charity in their name. That's what I've asked for, and received, from one of my kids. I've thought about giving them the same but so far haven't. Eventually I will but so far they seem to appreciate receiving a cheque each and a small token gift. I've always told them when I give them a gift it's theirs to keep, give away, or throw away - I don't care what they do with it. I don't expect to see the gift worn or displayed.
IMO it's more fun to give than receive and writing a cheque is not a cop-out to me. Also costs less to mail! The Grands like shopping at the after-Christmas sales with their money as they know they get more than they otherwise would.
Also IMO anyone who does not send a thank-you should not expect to receive another gift from that sender.
"I have always had an aversion to the concepts of in style and out of style." ~Rose Tarlow
Inspirational pics: http://inspiration4u.shutterfly.com/
I guess it was LOS writing about her grandson but all of a sudden I was reminded of my beloved Grandmother. She usually sent a card with $1 in it. I remember one Christmas spent apart from her. She sent a box of cookies for both me and my brother. Our favorite kind. Orange slice for him and oatmeal with raisin for me. Believe it or not, we really appreciated those cookies. BUT my favorite gifts from her were used - things that belonged to her - a locket, fruit knives that were a wedding present. They have been my treasures for almost 60 years but not as much as my memories of her.
How about specialty items of a thing the person likes: craft beers if a person likes beer, special wines to try for a wine lover, cheeses, etc.........
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